The Train Proficient User Test

I din’t have a lot to do with train commuters until I met some on Twitter.  Then I discovered a whole new world of #traingin, #amateurs and #traintweets.  I travelled by train myself for the first time in a while last week, and doing subsequent conversations, the following developed:-

The Train Proficient User Test

1.  Have you turned off notifications, clicky keyboard noises and game sounds on your phone?

2. Can you move all your luggage at once by yourself?

3.  Should you read a broadsheet, and if you do, is it acceptable to hold your hand in front of the face of your next seat neighbour?

4.  Do you believe that seats are for bags, feet, coats or bottoms?

5.  Is it generous to share your musical taste with your fellow travellers, or downright antisocial?

6. If you are using your phone should you speak loudly enough to ensure that 
    a)  all your fellow passengers can hear how important you are, and that you are on a train?
    b)  the person at the other end can hear you with or without the phone?

7.  If you have a choice of seats available to you, and you will need to move several times during your journey, is it more sensible to sit next to the aisle, or by the window so that you have to climb over the person next to you every time you wish to stand up or sit down?

My proposal is that if you answer any of those questions incorrectly, you should have to undergo intensive train user training, until you realise that behaving sensibly and with consideration for fellow passengers and railway staff makes you a true #trainpro.

If you wish to add more questions to the test, please indicate below.

Normal blogging will be resumed at the next station.


7 responses to “The Train Proficient User Test

  1. Wonderful. I hope you now confidently travel by train from now on! Also, I am challenged in my commuter grumpiness… not exactly salt and light, eh?

  2. Are you ready to leave your train as soon as it arrives at your destination? Even if it happens to be the final destination? Or do you sit in your seat until the train stops then gather all your belongings together, slowly, and move?

    If standing at the platform, do you allow passengers off the train before you board it? Do you (all twenty of you) stand immediately in front of the train door, blocking the exit of the departing passengers, and get annoyed when they then ask politely for you to move, so they may leave the train? (This also applies at lifts, shop doorways, etc.)

  3. I forgot to acknowledge the major contributions of Twitter friends @batty_towers @tall_rich @watfordgap and @ordinangst to this post – most of the questions were their's. Apologies and thanks!

  4. Very good – I think this could become a useful pamphlet to pass onto an Amateurs we encounter!

    An addition to number 3. …Or to use the aisle of the carriage as part of your reading room. Tutting back is not acceptable when you have to fold in your paper as I walk past.

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